Do you second guess yourself? Rely on others people’s opinions and advice before making decisions? We all do to some extent. However, we need to be careful. There’s a fine line between learning from others and giving our power away.
When you give more credence to external sources than your own internal wisdom, you are handing over your power to others.
Yes, there are experts. Yes, there are authorities on specialized subjects. However, when it comes to personal life decisions and matters of the heart, only you know what is best for you.
There is a deep well of wisdom within you. Your intuition, inner knowing, instinct or whatever you want to call it. It’s a source of guidance and truth. Truth about what is right for you. Not what is right or best for someone else. What is best for you.
What works for one person won’t necessarily work for someone else. And each person has their own unique circumstances, experiences, lessons, desires, purpose, and life path.
So, while it can be helpful to seek guidance from others, we must never let that undermine our own inner truth.
Energy Drain
When we start second guessing ourselves and try to find validation and answers from outside sources is when we start losing our personal power.
It’s like a slow drain of energy. Little by little, our power weakens.
Our self-confidence begins to wane. Our courage and enthusiasm give way to insecurity and self-doubt. Instead of having a sense of clarity, we end up with confusion.
So, what can you do?
- Remind yourself on a daily basis that YOU have the ultimate decision making guide within you. No one else, no matter how wise or experienced they may be, has authority over your intuition.
- Think of times in the past when your intuition or instincts were right and use this to build up confidence in your own decision making. Even better, make a list of all the times your intuition steered you in the right direction and refer back to it frequently.
- Recall times when you ignored your intuition and listened to well-meaning advice instead. What happened? How did it feel? How did your intuition let you know that maybe the advice you were receiving wasn’t right for you? Try to remember how your intuition communicated with you and use this as a guide to recognize it in the future, especially when you have misgivings about advice you receive or start relying too much on outside opinions.
- Learn how to quiet your mind so you can tune in to the subtle messages of your intuition. Meditation is one way, but there are many different things you can do to keep your thoughts from drowning out the voice of your intuition. The trick is to experiment and discover what works best for you, which will be different depending on the situation, how you are feeling, personal preferences, etc. Maybe it’s going for a walk, doing the dishes, cooking, dancing, meditating, jogging, doing yoga, knitting. Or our favorite: simply focusing on your breath.
- Pay attention to how often you rely on the advice of others. Are you looking outside for advice and answers more frequently than you realize? To keep an accurate perspective on things, start keeping track. Write it down if it helps. The key is to start paying attention to your behavior. How often do you say things such as: What do you think? What should I do?
- Notice when something within you raises a red flag. It could be a feeling in your gut or other part of your body, a feeling, a hunch, a dream, or some other sensation depending on how your intuition communicates with you. If something doesn’t feel right, don’t just shrug it off. Write it down and keep track of it in your journal.
- Learn from others, but make yourself the ultimate authority of your life. When taking in outside viewpoints or advice, evaluate the information objectively and then form your own final opinion, trusting in the fact that you have the ultimate say as to what is best for you.
Recognizing that your greatest source of wisdom and guidance comes from within, not from outside sources, is how you reclaim your personal power.
Instead of looking outside for answers, you become your own guru, your own guide, your own chief advisor.
Try out the tips above and keep track of the results. Over time, you’ll notice that your confidence grows, confusion lessens, and your sense of personal power returns.
